Fusspot rants, embarrassing photos of yourself and general correspondence go here: universalnicks@gmail.com

13 for 21, 174 yards, QB rating of 104.1. 1 TD, 1 sack, 1 fumble.


The following is a true story.

Around this time of year, we're known to carve a pumpkin or two. We were getting ready to carve a Broncos pumpkin, to honor our team of choice. We even selected the handsomest, roundest gourd available. Honest to God: It was a pumpkin of supreme pulchritude.

Imagine our surprise when we cut open our perfect pumpkin on Sunday, and found it to be disgustingly rotten on the inside.

What a perfect analogy for the Denver defense: A thing of beauty, until it's time for you to make true use of it. Only then do you discover the deception.

Are we reaching? Probably. But the Denver D really did throw up all over themselves during a critical game, and listening to Phil Simms verbally hump Peyton Manning for four quarters was more than we could bear.

Sorry Jake, we know it wasn't really your fault, but a loss is a loss. Happy Hallowe'en, Beardo. By the way, we threw Daniel Alfredsson in there for good measure, because lately, he's been just as relevant.

P.S. Those are the guts from our Buzzsaw pumpkin that The Driver requested -- he's got a thing for Matt Leinart (and bandwagons, apparently). More photos below.

Jake and Alfie in the shadow of the Buzzsaw

Cardinals pumpkin lit up. 1-7...scaroi!

Next week: At Pittsburgh.

The Dress Up Jake Archives: Week 1 Week 2 Week 3 Week 5 Week 6 Week 7

3 responses to "Dress Up Jake: Week 8"

  1. I think it's wrong to put the blame on the Defense as a whole. It was really the fault of CB Darrent Willaims. He doesn't have the skills to cover a #1 receiver (which is what Wayne would be on any other team). After all, Champ (as good as he is) can only cover one guy at a time.

    That being said, covering Jake in the guts of a pumpkin is entirely fitting. His fumble in the third quarter, which set up a TD for Indy made me puke my guts up!


  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.


  3. Hey, the pictures definately depict the Sens woes.

    This season the competition is tough. We have clearly some hope, I mean when they've been on, well, "wow".

    Is Mr. Sutter available to coach our team? Mabye we need a more forceful coach? Don't know.

    Anyway the Pizza line may be hot and cold, but anyway, one line never has one the cup. (Well unless that line had Jagr and Mario on it but in general, you need the whole team).

    Anyway, the Forum ghosts seems to have finally found the Bell Center?

    Ricky the "plush" Moose