The Universal Cynic

You know this is the type of thing I live for.

You may have heard that a pocket of Senators fans are planning to have a rally in support of Jason Spezza. According to their Facebook page, the gathering is to take place this Saturday at Parliament Hill (as of the writing of this post, there were 131 confirmed guests).

The Ottawa Citizen was tipped off on the gathering, and Allen Panzeri wrote an article about it. Guess what ensued? High comedy, of course. From the Panzeri piece:

"The aim of the rally will be to convince the Ottawa Senators to keep the mercurial centre instead of trading him before his no-trade clause kicks in on July 1."

"Mercurial"? Spezza? Jason would laugh like a lunatic if I waved a Twizzler in front of his face. You know the gold thread on the Ottawa sweaters? They added that so Giggles would have something shiny to hold his attention when he attempted his passes. If Spezza's mercurial, then Chris Pronger is due to appear on an episode of 'The First 48' any day now.

"The participants will come from two Facebook groups that have overlapping memberships: the “Let’s Keep Jason Spezza in Ottawa” group, which has more than 900 members, and the Red Scarf Union, which largely occupies a Section 319 at Scotiabank Place and claims 1,190 members."

Wow, and they're expecting such a turnout already? I guess everyone's going to the cottage that weekend.

Waiting for the icing on the cake? Here it comes:

"(Rally organizer Louise) Tremblay admits to being one of Spezza’s biggest critics initially, but said that with the arrival of coach Cory Clouston, Spezza’s work ethic has improved.

'He’s not floating as much as he used to,' she said."

Bloody hell, if that's not a selling point for a gathering, I don't know what is.

Now, before Senators fans jump down my throat, know this: I'm not anti-rally or anti-Spezza. I'm anti-ridiculousness, which unfortunately for Jason, his fans and Mr. Panzeri, this piece seems to have in spades.

More later.

According to Leclaire's comments in the Citizen, there's no real rhyme or reason to the design -- it's just a play on his former mask in Columbus.

To the front:



Now to the side (I feel like Tony Kornheiser, leading you through the Penguin Dance):



And an obstructed view of the striped (NOT barberpole) pads. Get the hell outta the way, Jared Cowen!



I think I'm ambivalent towards the mask -- I'm getting a woodgrain/alternate Bingo logo/James Hetfield vibe off of it. I don't know if I dig it, but ultimately I don't find it particularly weird or lame. I was concerned when I initially read about the pads -- people kept mentioning "barberpole", and that was a horrible visual. Thankfully, the stripes do run vertically and not horizontally. Again, different, but not entirely sold.

Granted, the point is moot when it comes to his overall play, but what do you want? We've still got a month to go. Deal with it.

More later.

Which side are you more likely to fall on? This one from yesterday, or the one that appeared today? We think it's pointless conversation, and therefore the second piece seems far more along the lines of our thinking on this subject.

P.S. When is everyone going to stop looking at Martin Gerber as a bank account that the team is not allowed to draw on? Hello -- you would need someone to replace him before you could make a trade. Not to be an a-hole about it, but I hope he torches Emery in camp just to make things interesting.